hello Allan,
its been a while since I written anything .. things was just too hectic with work.. and lately i'ven been feeling sick quiet often.. My tonsillitis is getting swollen every time the weather change, and my body pain from over exercising at the Gym.
I was looking through my blog and read a history of things happening in my life and sometimes I forget writing it myself.
Oh btw im going back to Tawau for my birthday this year. I have made a Oath to myself that I would spend more time with my family this year, but at times I think i'm failing. Anyway this year I am coming back for my birthday but I found out recently that my mum is not going to be in Tawau, as she is resting in KK .. yes her osteoporosis is getting worst and I wouldn't want to bug her to come to Tawau but it would be nice to have my mum. YESSSSSSSSSS I AM TURNING 47 this year.
The big 47. When I was my teen , I always imagine not growing old dying early he he, because I always think that my life will be rough and poorly lived, but now im 47, thanking GOD everyday for the wonderful gift to me.. having a good and rich life (spiritually , mentally and financially as compared to some other lads).
My birthday I plan just to have a simple celebration, going to my fathers grave to share my existence with him, asking for his prayers continue blessings. Maybe if I got time I would like to visit some of my ex classmates in Tawau found recently in facebook. I hope to rekindle our long lost friendship and maybe visiting BAL and even TAIKO PLANTATION. where it all begin.. would be nice to come back kan. I will take some pictures.. to see and hoping to see some old friends as well.
Wednesday, April 15, 2015
Monday, November 24, 2014
Dear me ( 24/11/2014),
I just came back from The Philippines yesterday, went up to pick up my Mum. She was there almost 2 months. She was okay as per say but lately I found her to be very quiet. I am not sure if the quiet is because she was tired from the long ordeal in Philippines or because she misses her sister.
She spend a lot of time inside her room and since Saturday she hardly watches tv. I hope .. whether its missing or tired, she would soon get over it. Sometimes I feel sad knowing that , the time when she really can visit her as frequent but it was too soon and Aunty Enida falls sick and now gone.
I know even if deep inside me I feel that they are not that close as sisters but deep inside my heart I know that my aunt really misses my mum. Have u ever felt there is a hole deep inside your heard that is not filled, because u misses someone.. knowing that that person is around but its just impossible to meet. I know both the sisters misses each other very much but to connect both places general santos and tawau is just impossible and there is also the cost constrain. My mother have been wishing to go back to Philippines for as long as I can remember but we have no idea how to go there.. and part of it is her to blame because she hardly talk about her birthplace.
When, we arrange to visit her hometown this year, she was so excited ,. I think the mere excitement is to visit her parents and siblings graveyard but most of all to visit her only remaining siblings. Funny when they meet there was an weird feeling.. both of the seems like different people.. Maybe it was me but I felt that they we so long and far apart that they hardly know how to connect at first. After a while Nanay felt at home but still the food remains the biggest thing ever. I notice that their food is far different from ours.. Nanay use to tell us when we were a kid how they use to catch the catfish in the paddy field and how they cook it with guava leaves. How the very traditional food nanay use to make and we grew up eathing all this Filipino traditional dish.
Then when we reach there ,.. THE FOOD IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT. The pinaksiu and adobo is not the way they prepare for us ..it taste different , it looks different and most of all the way they cook it almost alien to me. haha . I read once that The Chinese in Malaysia is more Chinese than the Chinese in China in terms of tradition and food,. because the Malaysian Chinese wants to preserve the traditional Chinese cooking but the Chinese in the Big Island sway themselves to a new way of cooking. I guess same goes with my parents and all my aunty and uncle. We including the second and third generation are paying close intention to keep the traditional taste even how hard it may be but in the Philipines they no longer know that traditional taste because the taste has been altered and altered many times hehehe. I doubt my nephew and nieces knows the original taste or even how to make pinaksiu and adobo.
So, that's my experience in the Great Adventure in The Philippines, my cousin say to me that maybe next year they want to make a reunion .. we'll see how it goes. But someday i hope to visit Philippines again , maybe this time its for a happy occasion.
I just came back from The Philippines yesterday, went up to pick up my Mum. She was there almost 2 months. She was okay as per say but lately I found her to be very quiet. I am not sure if the quiet is because she was tired from the long ordeal in Philippines or because she misses her sister.
She spend a lot of time inside her room and since Saturday she hardly watches tv. I hope .. whether its missing or tired, she would soon get over it. Sometimes I feel sad knowing that , the time when she really can visit her as frequent but it was too soon and Aunty Enida falls sick and now gone.
I know even if deep inside me I feel that they are not that close as sisters but deep inside my heart I know that my aunt really misses my mum. Have u ever felt there is a hole deep inside your heard that is not filled, because u misses someone.. knowing that that person is around but its just impossible to meet. I know both the sisters misses each other very much but to connect both places general santos and tawau is just impossible and there is also the cost constrain. My mother have been wishing to go back to Philippines for as long as I can remember but we have no idea how to go there.. and part of it is her to blame because she hardly talk about her birthplace.
When, we arrange to visit her hometown this year, she was so excited ,. I think the mere excitement is to visit her parents and siblings graveyard but most of all to visit her only remaining siblings. Funny when they meet there was an weird feeling.. both of the seems like different people.. Maybe it was me but I felt that they we so long and far apart that they hardly know how to connect at first. After a while Nanay felt at home but still the food remains the biggest thing ever. I notice that their food is far different from ours.. Nanay use to tell us when we were a kid how they use to catch the catfish in the paddy field and how they cook it with guava leaves. How the very traditional food nanay use to make and we grew up eathing all this Filipino traditional dish.
Then when we reach there ,.. THE FOOD IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT. The pinaksiu and adobo is not the way they prepare for us ..it taste different , it looks different and most of all the way they cook it almost alien to me. haha . I read once that The Chinese in Malaysia is more Chinese than the Chinese in China in terms of tradition and food,. because the Malaysian Chinese wants to preserve the traditional Chinese cooking but the Chinese in the Big Island sway themselves to a new way of cooking. I guess same goes with my parents and all my aunty and uncle. We including the second and third generation are paying close intention to keep the traditional taste even how hard it may be but in the Philipines they no longer know that traditional taste because the taste has been altered and altered many times hehehe. I doubt my nephew and nieces knows the original taste or even how to make pinaksiu and adobo.
So, that's my experience in the Great Adventure in The Philippines, my cousin say to me that maybe next year they want to make a reunion .. we'll see how it goes. But someday i hope to visit Philippines again , maybe this time its for a happy occasion.
Thursday, October 30, 2014
I WANT TO BE ME..
I saw Fadzilla yesterday, yes she is here in Serdang. Actually she came for a self marketing Seminar held in The mines exhibition centre. The Seminar is about how to market oneself and according to illa.. the seminar also teaches us how to interact with god so that he will answer all our prayers.
I picked her up in a nearby hotel and went to have our lunch near Serdang, and she was excitedly talking about her course. As usual illa was so pumped up, feeling excited with her discoveries. She explain to me about being successful we have to circle ourself with positive attitude people. I remember a book I read once " we are the 5 person closes to us". so means however positive we are but if we are surrounded by negative people, sooner or later their negative vibes will rub on you. That I know.
One thing that honestly have me thinking was how Fazila's thinking circle around wanting to be rich. I always believe when you focus yourself much on wanting a thinking and praying everyday for it.. soon God will render it to you. I know that soon fazila will have much as she wanted, ... then one thing she told me.. to present yourself like an old ape... ahhhhhhhhh don't show off otherwise people will feel that you are a threat, and somehow they will pull you down. Hm.. yes I know there is a truth in that , but to dress up like an old hag and appe.. nope not me. I dress up not to impress but to make myself worth.. I dress up not because for other people I dress up because I love myself and I feel that I'm worth.
All I wish for illa is go go ahead. I'm with you all the way.. I guess it would be naïve for me to say that my aim in life is not to be rich or super rich, I settle to become average, but if God will that I became one.....THANK YOU LORD ALLELUIA but for me life is short and I'm enjoying every minute of it. I know that it would be selfish or pathetic for me to say that que sera sera but I'm living my life in this moment... and enjoying what God has given to me everyday and every minute. Maybe its also up to priority .. mine is to be happy and possibly helping people around me and maybe illa priority is someday to become rich.
Whats yours.. do u want to become rich and you have plenty of money in the bank or live a full life with a fair amount of money. tepuk dada tanyalah selera kan.
I picked her up in a nearby hotel and went to have our lunch near Serdang, and she was excitedly talking about her course. As usual illa was so pumped up, feeling excited with her discoveries. She explain to me about being successful we have to circle ourself with positive attitude people. I remember a book I read once " we are the 5 person closes to us". so means however positive we are but if we are surrounded by negative people, sooner or later their negative vibes will rub on you. That I know.
One thing that honestly have me thinking was how Fazila's thinking circle around wanting to be rich. I always believe when you focus yourself much on wanting a thinking and praying everyday for it.. soon God will render it to you. I know that soon fazila will have much as she wanted, ... then one thing she told me.. to present yourself like an old ape... ahhhhhhhhh don't show off otherwise people will feel that you are a threat, and somehow they will pull you down. Hm.. yes I know there is a truth in that , but to dress up like an old hag and appe.. nope not me. I dress up not to impress but to make myself worth.. I dress up not because for other people I dress up because I love myself and I feel that I'm worth.
All I wish for illa is go go ahead. I'm with you all the way.. I guess it would be naïve for me to say that my aim in life is not to be rich or super rich, I settle to become average, but if God will that I became one.....THANK YOU LORD ALLELUIA but for me life is short and I'm enjoying every minute of it. I know that it would be selfish or pathetic for me to say that que sera sera but I'm living my life in this moment... and enjoying what God has given to me everyday and every minute. Maybe its also up to priority .. mine is to be happy and possibly helping people around me and maybe illa priority is someday to become rich.
Whats yours.. do u want to become rich and you have plenty of money in the bank or live a full life with a fair amount of money. tepuk dada tanyalah selera kan.
Monday, October 27, 2014
Dear Allan,
Went to Church yesterday, Its been a while since I came back from the Philippines to send my mum to her home town in General Santos, Mindanao. My Aunt is sick .. quiet a fatal disease.
It was a quick journey for me and my mum.. everything was set up so quickly and by the time I realize it, we were on the way to Manila. It was during the Haj Celebration in between so I manage to not take any more of my little annual leave.
It was pouring rain in Manila that night when we arrive, we stayed the same hotel that we've stayed before ( EUROHOTEL) in Malate, supposingly we went out for dinner that night but decided to just order in coz of the rain. Anyway the food was okay..
The next morning we shoot of to the airport and after 2 hours plus on the plane we arrive safely in GenSan. My cousin was a bit late picking us up, after finally 1 hour of waiting they came.. thank goodness I insisted my mum to not take the taxi sapu otherwise it will be very expensive.
We have lunch along the way to the hospital. we have bbq chicken and rice. When we arrive at the hospital ( suppose to be a private practice but looks like Tawau General hospital 20 years ago , you can tell by the sign board writing that was written with hand hehehe). When we enter my aunts room, everyone was so surprise to see us... I thought everyone knew we're coming. When my Aunt Neda saw us, I could tell she was happy to see her last remaining siblings. She make an effort to sit down next to my mum.. tapping her feet and saying to everyone " amun ni bunsu" ( this is our youngest). After all these years of being away and being reunited again I could feel how she misses my mother so much.. and still attachly feel my mother is their youngest in the family. Then flashes of memories came to me how my mum always tell everyone that I was her bunsu. I was picturing myself in my mums positon someday and I burst in tears. How.. maybe in years to come that will be me.
Then my mum ask me to feel my Aunt with the Chocolate we bought from Malaysia. I know she loves Chocolate as our last visit we bought some too and she kept it to her self hehehe, that's cute. My tears flows down like rain that day, trying to keep my compost and trying to feed her is just to much for me. Then of the 3rd serving she cough I guess the sugar is too much. Then gently my mum ask me to go outside to retain myself from crying.
Do you know that sadden me the most is .. having so little time to know my Aunt.. Yes I meet her for the first time in February this year , she was strong and I remember asking her to visit us in Malaysia one day ... and she said yes if I got married hehehe yeaaaaaa like that's going to happen. Another thing that sadden me so much is that my sister and my cousins never got to know her .. if she passed. To know our roots and to meet one of the remaining member of my Mums family. I do hope that they would just take a time and visit before its too late.. I know everyone is busy with their life but tryyy..
That night I spend the whole night at the hospital to watch over my Aunt. I had a few sleep but I know she was in pain. The next morning I flew from GENSAN early morning at reach manila in the afternoon and flew to Kuala Lumpur in the evening. I reach KL at nearly 10 pm and finally reach home by midnight.
Then I was down with fever, cough and sore throat for a week.. so I skip sunday mass for 2 weeks, but the lord is always by my side. I remember waching Oprah online yesterday .. a quote by her GOD APPRECIATE BEING APPRECIATED, that y I always thank GOD everyday for even a little things he rendered to me.
LORD JESUS thank you for giving me a good family, a good life , good health everyday .. AMEN
Went to Church yesterday, Its been a while since I came back from the Philippines to send my mum to her home town in General Santos, Mindanao. My Aunt is sick .. quiet a fatal disease.
It was a quick journey for me and my mum.. everything was set up so quickly and by the time I realize it, we were on the way to Manila. It was during the Haj Celebration in between so I manage to not take any more of my little annual leave.
It was pouring rain in Manila that night when we arrive, we stayed the same hotel that we've stayed before ( EUROHOTEL) in Malate, supposingly we went out for dinner that night but decided to just order in coz of the rain. Anyway the food was okay..
The next morning we shoot of to the airport and after 2 hours plus on the plane we arrive safely in GenSan. My cousin was a bit late picking us up, after finally 1 hour of waiting they came.. thank goodness I insisted my mum to not take the taxi sapu otherwise it will be very expensive.
We have lunch along the way to the hospital. we have bbq chicken and rice. When we arrive at the hospital ( suppose to be a private practice but looks like Tawau General hospital 20 years ago , you can tell by the sign board writing that was written with hand hehehe). When we enter my aunts room, everyone was so surprise to see us... I thought everyone knew we're coming. When my Aunt Neda saw us, I could tell she was happy to see her last remaining siblings. She make an effort to sit down next to my mum.. tapping her feet and saying to everyone " amun ni bunsu" ( this is our youngest). After all these years of being away and being reunited again I could feel how she misses my mother so much.. and still attachly feel my mother is their youngest in the family. Then flashes of memories came to me how my mum always tell everyone that I was her bunsu. I was picturing myself in my mums positon someday and I burst in tears. How.. maybe in years to come that will be me.
Then my mum ask me to feel my Aunt with the Chocolate we bought from Malaysia. I know she loves Chocolate as our last visit we bought some too and she kept it to her self hehehe, that's cute. My tears flows down like rain that day, trying to keep my compost and trying to feed her is just to much for me. Then of the 3rd serving she cough I guess the sugar is too much. Then gently my mum ask me to go outside to retain myself from crying.
Do you know that sadden me the most is .. having so little time to know my Aunt.. Yes I meet her for the first time in February this year , she was strong and I remember asking her to visit us in Malaysia one day ... and she said yes if I got married hehehe yeaaaaaa like that's going to happen. Another thing that sadden me so much is that my sister and my cousins never got to know her .. if she passed. To know our roots and to meet one of the remaining member of my Mums family. I do hope that they would just take a time and visit before its too late.. I know everyone is busy with their life but tryyy..
That night I spend the whole night at the hospital to watch over my Aunt. I had a few sleep but I know she was in pain. The next morning I flew from GENSAN early morning at reach manila in the afternoon and flew to Kuala Lumpur in the evening. I reach KL at nearly 10 pm and finally reach home by midnight.
Then I was down with fever, cough and sore throat for a week.. so I skip sunday mass for 2 weeks, but the lord is always by my side. I remember waching Oprah online yesterday .. a quote by her GOD APPRECIATE BEING APPRECIATED, that y I always thank GOD everyday for even a little things he rendered to me.
LORD JESUS thank you for giving me a good family, a good life , good health everyday .. AMEN
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
A TRIBUTE TO MY BABY MYVI QTE71
I was thinking of posting this tribute to my Myvi a while back, my QTE 71 but I was so busy with work and sending my mum back to Phil sekejap that I forgot doing it.
Yes, my Myvi was my baby ,.. bought her in Bintulu in 2007 ( I think). The first time my agent handed me my Myvi car keys, it was one of the happiest days of my life. Upgraded from my BGD5429 kancil to my QTE71 myvi was a big accomplishment for me. I am not such a car guy but upgrading myself from a small car to a slightly big car makes me proud of myself ( tapping my back and said GOOD JOB U'VE UPGRADED URSELF FINALLY ).
When I bought my Beetle, I told my agent that I still want to use my old number if its possible.. I love my existing number QTE71 as it has so many significant meaning to me , and my agent told me that he can do it with a little bit of payment ( RM 650), according to him , my old car will have its own new number and my Beetle with come with my old number. All that I know my old myvi will be ___9433.
I share some great moment with my Myvi,
1. You have always been there for me... I remember the time with I got robbed and I drove u to the hospital .. bleeding with all cuts and bruises .. ( one of the reason I got you upholster to hide my blood on the car seat.
2. One good thing.. my Myvi never breaks down.. not even once.. well my kancil previously pun sama jugak.. I guess im such a good driver and my car seems to like me very much.
So to my old car,.. my beloved Myvi.. I owe you my life dear and I thank you for the 8 and half year we were together. My hope and dream is that you will find a good owner that will treat you the same way as I did. Thanks thanks and many thanks.. love you baby.
Yes, my Myvi was my baby ,.. bought her in Bintulu in 2007 ( I think). The first time my agent handed me my Myvi car keys, it was one of the happiest days of my life. Upgraded from my BGD5429 kancil to my QTE71 myvi was a big accomplishment for me. I am not such a car guy but upgrading myself from a small car to a slightly big car makes me proud of myself ( tapping my back and said GOOD JOB U'VE UPGRADED URSELF FINALLY ).
When I bought my Beetle, I told my agent that I still want to use my old number if its possible.. I love my existing number QTE71 as it has so many significant meaning to me , and my agent told me that he can do it with a little bit of payment ( RM 650), according to him , my old car will have its own new number and my Beetle with come with my old number. All that I know my old myvi will be ___9433.
I share some great moment with my Myvi,
1. You have always been there for me... I remember the time with I got robbed and I drove u to the hospital .. bleeding with all cuts and bruises .. ( one of the reason I got you upholster to hide my blood on the car seat.
2. One good thing.. my Myvi never breaks down.. not even once.. well my kancil previously pun sama jugak.. I guess im such a good driver and my car seems to like me very much.
So to my old car,.. my beloved Myvi.. I owe you my life dear and I thank you for the 8 and half year we were together. My hope and dream is that you will find a good owner that will treat you the same way as I did. Thanks thanks and many thanks.. love you baby.
Friday, October 17, 2014
Introducing my "Freveluz bug".
Today its almost been 3 weeks since I got my new car.. Yes people I bought myself a Volkswagen Beetle, the one car that I always wanted to own.
Some people wanted to buy a Mercedes Benz or an Audi, well I am a Beetle guy. This brings me way back to when I was a small boy in BAL plantation almost 40 years ago. I clearly remember watching the Bal Estate Plantation managers riding their beetle. We use to call it kereta Labi labi..a kind of tortoise. I always love the design and the moment I sat eyes on it, I feel deeply in love the THE BEETLE.
When the new beetle came in 1998 the first time I sat eyes on her, I nearly kiss it. loving it so much, and every time I saw somebody driving a beetle, my neck will always elongated .. to see who's the driver, coz I know I could never own one because it would be too expensive for me ( at that time a beetle cost nearly 200k).
2012 the beetle hatchback was introduce..( I was the prelaunch in OPRAH) I was not very keen on the design at first.. still love the new beetle design but after a while it grew on me. He he I remember putting a flyers on my fridge and my office wall to remind me, my wish will someday come true. So on the 1st or October I got my love .. my long time sweetheart my beetle hatchback bug. Ahhhh my wish come true.. the funny thing is nobody knew it hehehe was a big surprise to my mum.
Now every time I drive my beetle, it always put a big smile on my face... once it was only a dream became a reality to me.. thank you Jesus.. for answering my wish. So here u are,, I'm introducing my Beetle FREVELUZ.. ITS AN ACRONAME FOR FRED EVELYN AND LUZ.. MY SIBLINGS.. FOR WITHOUT THEM ALL OF THIS COULD NEVER COME.
Monday, July 22, 2013
MY TEARS FELL DOWN WHEN I SAW THIS
I was looking at this, and it shed a tears in my eyes... I hope it wouldn't offend anyone especially its a religion thing.. but it really touch my heart.
Friday, April 26, 2013
A RUDE AWAKENING FROM THE GYM
Last night i was at the Gym and i heard a disturbing conversation between one of them is the Gymstructor and the other one is a Gym member.
Gym instructor: My life is centered upon my body.. all my salary 3 k plus .. goes all to my body buying protein, eating high protein food and supplements.
Gym Member: Wow, is that so much to maintain your physic, what happens when you didnt take those supplements anymore.
Gym Structor: I ever stop working-out and it made me fat coz all the protein in my body turn automatically into fat
I mean hello, lets be realistic., all your salary goes all to your body.. i mean there is consciousness about health but don't you think he is overdoing it. I guess that what's happens when you didn't invest on the brain hehehe ( jahat aku kan).
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Damn im sick ..
Oh god, its been 3 days with running nose. cough and a little bit of fever. My throat feels icthy and my cough is getting worst. I went to UPM clinic this morning and was given a days leave.. but i guess its not getting better coz i still got my cough.
oh God i hate it when im sick..
Monday, April 15, 2013
FINALLY I GOT GUTS TO DO IT.
Last week i fill up my application for my study leave.. i need to finish my studies asap. Actually my studies started in 2009 and i finish all of my subjects that i've taken leaving my thesis.. which is very hard to do when ur working ( AND I MUST ADMIT too i hate doing it and keep on procastinating from it).
So this year i finally have the courage to fill up my application form and discuss with my Dean and my boss. I hope everything went well and i can start consentration on my studies again, which i abondoned so long.
i have another appointment with my eye specialist on my eyes.. coz last time i check my right eye is still did not recover and it still blurry a lil bit. I hope the doctor got an explaination for this and if he suggested for me to redo my eys,.. im all for it but im not paying anything anymore, coz i paid so much from the last surgery.
I pray to the lord that my application will be approved and that my eyes will be solve asap. Dear Lord guide me.
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
my new puppy
i should have posted this entry a few month ago, remember my entry on my new white schnauzer , she turns out to be not a pure breed, and i had her exchange ( oh yes im so cruel) for a poodle,, actually i would prefer a white schnauzer but its imposible .. so i opted to exchange her for another poodle with the same name..
so thats it, i have a new brown cola toy poodle.. she is almost 3 month now and getting bigger by the day.. and her furr is so soft. my little regalo is like a rat.. jumping and being so nakal by the day.. but its nice to add her to my addition at home.
MY RECENT EYE SURGERY
Hmmm this is a wierd entry coz im exposing what is happening in my life.. and this is one of the craziest thing that i ever done.. since.. entah kan..
I recently did a contact lenses implant in my eyss and it took 2 procedure with a laps of almost a week on each eye. So far it has been good, i did the procedure in KPJ damansara specialist and the dr that did the procedure is dr choon from eye speciallist in kelana jaya.
The procedure was quick , only took around 20 miutes to do but it was agonazing.. thinking that its our eyes and people is poking and slicing ur eyes.. but the result is awesome so far.. im still having a little bit of blurry on both eyes.. but the first eyes is getting sharp. you know what i like about this procedure.. its liberating and not using any spectacles is like not doing something that we have been doing all our life..so it is pretty awesome.. i thanks syarifah,, my sister for helping me going tru this.. without their help and support nothing of this would happen.. and most of all i thank GOD for keeping me safe. not forgetting the dr and nurses that tended to me.
Friday, February 1, 2013
I'M SO CONFUSED.
THIS MORNING IN QUIET A LONG TIME.. MY MIND GOES HAY WIRE AGAIN OVER MY RECENT STAFF STRUCTURE.
I HAVE THIS ONE STAFF THAT I JUST COULDNT UNDERSTAND.. SHE BEING SO BRAT IN MY ORGANIZATION AND YET BECAUSE SHE IS MY SUPPORTING STAFF,A WOMEN, SHE TENDS TO GET AWAY WITH THINGS. THAT WOULDNT COUNT ON THE NUMEROUS TIMES SHE ACTS WITHOUT MANNERS. I HAD SOME BAD STAFF LAST TIME ESPECIALLY WHEN I WAS WORKING IN THE PLANTATION BUT SHE SURPASS ALL OF THEM, WITH HER ATTITUDE HER WAYS TO MAKE U FEEL UHHHHHHHHHHHH. I HATE HER SO MUCH.
SO TODAY, I HAD ANOTHER OPEN TALK SESSION AND I GUESS WE REACH SOMETHING NEW AND SOME NEW IMPROVEMENT BUT SEE HOW IT GOES AFTER A FEW WEEKS OR EVEN DAYS. IF SHE IS STILL NOT WILLING TO COOPERATE.
LETS PRAY FOT THINGS TO GET BETTER..
Sunday, January 27, 2013
MY LITTLE REGALO
Monday, July 9, 2012
i was looking and browsing tru my pc and found this file. Its a thing that i use to help diding with.. it seems that every time she wants to compose something, she would ask me to do it for her. hehehe. so enjoy the story.
HOW I END UP BEING HERE ( My little success story)
Ssssssss staring at my keyboard trying to felicitate my success story, Hmm…my mind goes numb and I guess this is what they say a writer’s block. There is so much to say and yet, not even a single word appears inside my mind , how am I suppose to write how I felt, let alone to put it down on papers.
Many things rushes through my mind when I think , how did I get to this place. The people that encourage me, the people that supported me but most of all the people that makes a great difference in my life that made me who I am today.
Confucius once said “ A journey of a thousand miles began with a single step”. That’s a strong word to carry but was what my ex branch Manager Mr. Sen Hung Keong meant when he told me “ Amylyn if you want to have a better career in Maybank, you must be in the sales line”. At that time the only thing comes to my mind is Why meeeeeeeee…. Lord is this a penalty of something I did or didn’t do before life, but then, with an endless guidance and support, working day and night trying to understand the business then one day I woke up and discover within me my Dot.
I discover that everything begins with a single dot , because if we do not change , we can become Extinct and when we move beyond our fear, then we are free. Sometimes the simplest phone call could make a great difference in our career, so just pick up the phone.
The 19 years of my tenure with MAYBANK, there was never a day that I felt I was in a wrong place. At times I felt beaten up but I just pick myself up and tell myself “ every sacrifice has it price”. What motivates me the most is how the management and colleagues supported me endlessly because never have I felt my years with MAYBANK hallow. My presence meant a great deal and what I say and do matters.
Purely what ever happens in my life and my career is because I got a very strong support system from my colleges and my family. My rock is my family who have supported me along the way, but things wouldn’t be so kind and great without the blessing of the almighty GOD.
My greatest satisfaction in my work is purely to help people in their financial circumstances and knowing that they achieve something financially puts up a great smile on my face and the rewards ain’t bad too ( smile).
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
NEW UPDATE
its been ages since i update this blog. i'm too involve with facebook that i nearly forgotted that i got another baby to look besides my dog. Just that u need time and energy to write but u only need a word to update ur facebook and see if there is any comments.
at least with the facebook , u got an instance comment and sometimes facebook can make a lot of haywire things in our lives. its different when we are blogging coz the art of blogging is like writting and telling ur little story to everyone or noone accept urself.
I was never a writter, but i am a great philospher ( my sister said to me , that when u have less, then u become a philisopher coz u see things more when u got less). i guess its right but for me ( dululah) the greatest things about writting is sharing my experience and sharing positive things that i gain from other people, hoping that other poeple will somehow get a benefit from it ( even its a micro benefit but still its a benefit right).Then its the sharing of information and sharing of thoughts between me , my readers ( if i got any left) and my siblings, coz my sister use to ask me to update my blog proptly but i just doenst have the time to do it.
I guess one of the reason , im not blogging as well is when Oprah put a finale in her show. There is nothing to discuss, nothing to ponder and most of all there is nothing to look forward to once u get home. OHHHHHHH OPRAH I MISS YOU. BUT HEY I Got this one channel ( my niece told me about it) its www.1channel.ch . i think this is the greatest finding one could ever had, coz i rarely see tv i just log in to this site and see every movie i want, every talkshow i want ( oprah classroom channel) and so many other things, so thank you Inday and thank you grace to introducing the channel to me. NOW MY LIFE IS FILLED AGAIN HEHEHE.
Last night i saw the oprah whinfrey story on telling the truth and releasing oneself from our little secret so that we could be free .... hmmmm what do u think.. i think its good but the horror ......... no doubt everyone of us got our little secret, that we kept of our friends, our family members even with friends working with us. but what if we tell everything we have so that the secret wouldnt be a secret anymore and we release ourself from the lies that we kept all this years. Wouldnt that be liberating, think about it, and i sure am going to think hard about it too.
at least with the facebook , u got an instance comment and sometimes facebook can make a lot of haywire things in our lives. its different when we are blogging coz the art of blogging is like writting and telling ur little story to everyone or noone accept urself.
I was never a writter, but i am a great philospher ( my sister said to me , that when u have less, then u become a philisopher coz u see things more when u got less). i guess its right but for me ( dululah) the greatest things about writting is sharing my experience and sharing positive things that i gain from other people, hoping that other poeple will somehow get a benefit from it ( even its a micro benefit but still its a benefit right).Then its the sharing of information and sharing of thoughts between me , my readers ( if i got any left) and my siblings, coz my sister use to ask me to update my blog proptly but i just doenst have the time to do it.
I guess one of the reason , im not blogging as well is when Oprah put a finale in her show. There is nothing to discuss, nothing to ponder and most of all there is nothing to look forward to once u get home. OHHHHHHH OPRAH I MISS YOU. BUT HEY I Got this one channel ( my niece told me about it) its www.1channel.ch . i think this is the greatest finding one could ever had, coz i rarely see tv i just log in to this site and see every movie i want, every talkshow i want ( oprah classroom channel) and so many other things, so thank you Inday and thank you grace to introducing the channel to me. NOW MY LIFE IS FILLED AGAIN HEHEHE.
Last night i saw the oprah whinfrey story on telling the truth and releasing oneself from our little secret so that we could be free .... hmmmm what do u think.. i think its good but the horror ......... no doubt everyone of us got our little secret, that we kept of our friends, our family members even with friends working with us. but what if we tell everything we have so that the secret wouldnt be a secret anymore and we release ourself from the lies that we kept all this years. Wouldnt that be liberating, think about it, and i sure am going to think hard about it too.
Monday, January 2, 2012
THERE IS SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR.
THE year 2011 just passed and looking at it.. there is so much to be thankful for.. its up to us to make the change.
here are the things that i,m thankful off:-
1. I'm thankful for the time of togetherness with my family . This is the first time ever that we are together accept for Aishah.
2. I'm thankful that god gave me a year to be with my family that i love so very much.
3. I'm thankful that my relationship with my sister has improved this year ( i'm smilling right now)
4. I'm thankful that my family had a wonderful health this year.
5. I'm thankful that moved in to my wonderful house and meet a lot of good friends along the way.
6. I'm thankful that my career has been well last year and there is alot of changes happening at my work place ( positive things)
7. I'm thankful to see the smile on my mother's face when she saw the whole family gets together smilling during christmas this year.
i will keep on adding things that i'm thankful from time to time..
"Thankful"
Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can't see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Even with our differences
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more
There's so much to be thankful for
here are the things that i,m thankful off:-
1. I'm thankful for the time of togetherness with my family . This is the first time ever that we are together accept for Aishah.
2. I'm thankful that god gave me a year to be with my family that i love so very much.
3. I'm thankful that my relationship with my sister has improved this year ( i'm smilling right now)
4. I'm thankful that my family had a wonderful health this year.
5. I'm thankful that moved in to my wonderful house and meet a lot of good friends along the way.
6. I'm thankful that my career has been well last year and there is alot of changes happening at my work place ( positive things)
7. I'm thankful to see the smile on my mother's face when she saw the whole family gets together smilling during christmas this year.
i will keep on adding things that i'm thankful from time to time..
"Thankful"
Somedays we forget
To look around us
Somedays we can't see
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Even with our differences
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light
So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more
There's so much to be thankful for
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Would it be kind.
A few weeks ago something happen between me and a good friend of mine. She was about to go back to Bintulu after 4 years of study leave( u know who i meant right), but towards the very last week, we ( its was not we, coz i was not angry) she got so angry with me for one particular reason.
If you are reading this.. honestly i have nothing against u. I never devide my friends into categories .. all my friends are good freinds and i love all of you dearly. But i think we should support friends in times of trouble and i think she need us at this juncture coz she is having a hard time dealing with her divorce and the lost of her career. I was there for you when you need in lying down in the hospital feeling so helpless, not shutting my eyes even a minute coz i know u need me the most and yet you have the guts to say i never supported you all this while.
What crumbles me most of all is how everyone treat as if i'm the bad person ,when in fact the only thing i did was wanting nobody to be left out. nobody to be left behind. What would u feel if someday , you are in a bad situation and everyone ditch you behind.
Maybe i would sound so arrogant or selfish for not going with all of you during the weekend but i believe at least she is not left behind alone.. at least im left behind too and she wouldnt feel so bad. Don't get me back to the time how everyone cheats me and stab me from behind and you were one of the culprits, how hurtful i felt after all the years i've invested in our friendship. You told me you did it because you didnt want to take sides but u did.. at least this time round i didnt take anyone side, i didnt take yours and i didnt take L's side either.
I hope you would understand me. I care and love all my dearest friends and hurting each one of you means its hurts me as well but i have to take my stand .. nobody should be left behind. NOBODY SHOULD BE LEFT ALONE. Another friend of mine explain that , she have the right to choose who she wants to bring coz its her apartment and her weekend but is it to the expense of leaving another friend behind. What if that person is you........ what if the person that was left behind is you.. wouldnt you feel hurt.. OOHhhhhhhhhh never mind we wouldnt tell her.. if she doesnt know wouldnt hurt her.. what if she knewwwwwwwwww.
Think about it... what if someday the one left behind is you..
If you are reading this.. honestly i have nothing against u. I never devide my friends into categories .. all my friends are good freinds and i love all of you dearly. But i think we should support friends in times of trouble and i think she need us at this juncture coz she is having a hard time dealing with her divorce and the lost of her career. I was there for you when you need in lying down in the hospital feeling so helpless, not shutting my eyes even a minute coz i know u need me the most and yet you have the guts to say i never supported you all this while.
What crumbles me most of all is how everyone treat as if i'm the bad person ,when in fact the only thing i did was wanting nobody to be left out. nobody to be left behind. What would u feel if someday , you are in a bad situation and everyone ditch you behind.
Maybe i would sound so arrogant or selfish for not going with all of you during the weekend but i believe at least she is not left behind alone.. at least im left behind too and she wouldnt feel so bad. Don't get me back to the time how everyone cheats me and stab me from behind and you were one of the culprits, how hurtful i felt after all the years i've invested in our friendship. You told me you did it because you didnt want to take sides but u did.. at least this time round i didnt take anyone side, i didnt take yours and i didnt take L's side either.
I hope you would understand me. I care and love all my dearest friends and hurting each one of you means its hurts me as well but i have to take my stand .. nobody should be left behind. NOBODY SHOULD BE LEFT ALONE. Another friend of mine explain that , she have the right to choose who she wants to bring coz its her apartment and her weekend but is it to the expense of leaving another friend behind. What if that person is you........ what if the person that was left behind is you.. wouldnt you feel hurt.. OOHhhhhhhhhh never mind we wouldnt tell her.. if she doesnt know wouldnt hurt her.. what if she knewwwwwwwwww.
Think about it... what if someday the one left behind is you..
Two house for a house.
Sometimes i wonder, what are we aiming for in life.. a good life.. a big house.. a nice car or even as many children as possible.
Then it get me thinking.. im paying almost a thousand plus for my house for a long period of time and it strikes me.. how much am i paying until i can call the house my own. Then i start calculating and OMG im going to pay almost double what i loan for the house.
Even with the Government load, i still paying double the amount,, ... and it prolong as long as i live. , What if i die early.. then the house will be paid in full and the person benefited will own a fully paid house., but as long as im living , i am liable to pay for my house hehehe.
Have you ever think about it.. how our lives tangled with all these depts. ahhhhhhhh.. how can we stop this feeling. No debts .. means no house, no car .. no nothing.. well not entirely nothing but no higher puchase asets.
How can i add to my income , so that i can be free from all of this........... think allan think.
They are getting younger by the day. ( needles and pin)
I was checking my students ( PITO) class today and one of them put their ic no in front of the report and my god these students are born in 1985 hehe. wow i was 17 at that time . i was doing my spm when these teachers are born and now luckly im teaching them.
Now i feel like an old haggggggg.. hehehe but to my surprise ,.. they look alot older than me ( aduh perasan la ni).
I guess the riddles is soooooo right when it says " needles and pins , needles and pins, when a mans married, his trouble begins.
Now i feel like an old haggggggg.. hehehe but to my surprise ,.. they look alot older than me ( aduh perasan la ni).
I guess the riddles is soooooo right when it says " needles and pins , needles and pins, when a mans married, his trouble begins.
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